#15 - I Never Could Resolve The Conflict Of My Cancer at 23, Perhaps Until Now
A raw story from my heart to yours.
Hello friends,
Welcome to another post from The 3Min Club, where you’ll receive 3Ms (movement, mindfulness, mantra) from me to do in 3 minutes. No matter where we are right now, taking the right actions is the key to living well, moving well, and being positive.
P.S. This post will not contain our usual 3Ms. I am considering switching the format around for 2022.
Just like that, a year is about to bid us farewell.
And like any other year, we tend to lament on the past 365.25 days, on the events and experiences, on the should-haves and should-not-haves.
We make pacts with ourselves to lose weight, get our health better or improve our social lives, go on more dates, or start a saving plan, or just setting new goals big or small, in the coming new year.
I am not sure when but I have long thrown this whole new year resolution aside, instead I focus on what is before me. I choose to look at the world through the lens of gratitude for my growth in all areas (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, personally, and socially)
And even if there’s no significant direction forward, sometimes being just status quo isn’t a bad thing — a thought inspired by Nora McInerny on Ted's blog entitled - Let this be your mantra: “Nothing new for now”)
WE DON’T ALWAYS HAVE TO HAVE SOMETHING NEW IN THE NEW YEAR. It’s okay to be living the “boring” normal lives for now - sleep, brush teeth, eat, work, read, gentle walks, sleep again.
A few days ago, I published a raw story about a phase in my life that’s close to my heart. I don’t know how many of you read my stories, or how many of you know about my cancer episode 14 years ago.
I don’t always talk or write much about the period. It wasn’t because I was embarrassed, but more to do with the fact I was young to make sense of the episode. This was also well before the days of blasting everything on social media! I didn’t take many photos or vlog my chemotherapy sessions. I didn't have records of my “celebration” when my last chemotherapy session ended. All I had are memories in my hippocampus, the part of brain that stores long-term memories, and the amygdala, the part of the brain that stores emotions of these experiences.
So writing this piece of story activated those parts of my brain and brought me back to memory lane.
This piece, I Had Stage III Cancer At 23 and 3 Books That Kept Me Surviving After (14 years later, a story just in time and never too late.) was initially scheduled to go live in October on another platform but that didn’t happen.
And as the year 2021 is coming to a close, reflecting on the past year jotted my memory back to this piece. I decided to publish just in time for the new year’s.
I hope you will read it and let me know your thoughts.
Have you experienced anything that is life-changing that made your start questioning about your identity? How did you come to resolve that inner conflict?
With this, I wish you and your loved ones a very healthy and peaceful 2022 ahead.
Yours,
Yan
Feeling a little kind?
Consider supporting my journey by buying a cup of tea at my new kofi store here.
Also if you like to collaborate, please message me here too.
Appreciate your hearts and comments.
Click on ❤️ to show a little support for this post.
Your thoughts are welcome too.
My Mom has cancer now and this was helpful to read.
That’s looks like a brave share! Will save your essay to read later. It can be so healing to make our personal stories into essays. I’ve done that a lot too. Apropo creative tension.